`My dark reflections`

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Your face is burned inside my brain
I lost my way
Your taste of stale flows through my veins
The cost of hate
‘Cause you’ll never understand me
You want me to stay

You’re c-c-c-calling but I can’t hear you
I’m not listening anymore
You’re subject to falling but I can’t save you
I don’t see you anymore

The race of slowing down the pain, I found a way
The pace of speaking so mundane, the sound of gain
But you’ll never make me happy
So I’ve extinguished the flame

You’re c-c-c-calling, but I cant hear you
I’m not listening anymore
You’re subject to falling, but I can’t save you
I don’t see you anymore

And what you want me to say I’ll never say
You’re playing the game that I’ll never play
So what do you want from me?
Now I’ve extinguished the flame

Your c-c-c-calling but I can’t hear you
I’m not listening anymore
You’re subject to falling but I can’t save you
I don’t see you anymore

You’re c-c-c-calling but I can’t hear you, I’m not listening anymore
You’re f-f-f-falling, but I can’t save you
I don’t see you anymore

Fight the fight alone
When the world is full of victims
Dims a fading light
In our souls

Leave the peace alone
Now we all are slowly changing
Dims a fading light
In our souls

In my opinion seeing is to know
The things we hold
Are always first to go
And who's to say
We won't end up alone

On broken wings I'm falling
And it won't be long
The skin on me is burning
By the fires of the sun
On skinned knees
I'm bleeding
And it won't be long
I've got to find that meaning
I'll search for so long

Cry ourselves to sleep
We will sleep alone forever
Will you lay me down
In the same place with all I love

Mend the broken homes
Care for them they are our brothers
Save the fading light in our souls

In my opinion seeing is to know
What you give
Will always carry you
And who's to say
We won't survive it too

[CHORUS]

Set a-free all
Relying on their will
To make me all that I am
And all that I'll be
Set a-free all
Will fall between the cracks
With memories of all that I am
And I'll that I'll be

[CHORUS]

That's enough of that bullshit. Who am I kidding? I might have been sad, but now I think...yeah, I'm fine with being whatever emotion I am. At least it reminds me that, I'm still human. So what to say...what to say...Obviously there's nothing to say. lol. I'm doing pretty good, my friends...they're happy, most of them. Maybe not with eachother, but hopefully with themselves. And if not...what can I say?

Get used to the pain,
grow accustom to the sorrow,
things won't get better,
just as long as you're not hollow.

;) That is all for now. Next...to make myself happy, make someone else happy, try and mend what was once broken.

Higfhlight of Today: Well...*shrugs* you got me. Probably hanging out with Jesse. That was fun, and took away the cold for a little while. Only one other person who's done that for me.

DL Rec.:
Disturbed's Stricken
Disturbed's Guarded
Taproot's Calling
Taproot's Facepeeler

Another night again
Another journey without friends
Another fight to wish away the loneliness I live

Another circus show
Another face that I don’t know
Another night of people asking what I have to give

I thought that I would drown
But it’s okay right now

[Chorus:]
No one knows the way I feel a part of me I have to fight
Buried somewhere deep beneath my skin
The emptiness in me is faded
And I can see my life is waiting
Now I know I’m living for who I am [2x]

The fire grows inside
The feeling cannot be denied
And everywhere I turn the size of guys they push me

And all has fallen down
But it’s okay right now

[Chorus:]
No one knows the way I feel a part of me I have to fight
Buried somewhere deep beneath my skin
The emptiness in me is faded
And I can see my life is waiting
Now I know I’m living for who I am

And everything seems great and everyone is fake
No one really knows you
Look into their eyes
Rip off your disguise
Let them see the real you

[Chorus:]
No one knows the way I feel a part of me I have to fight
Buried somewhere deep beneath my skin
The emptiness in me is faded
And I can see my life is waiting
Now I know I’m living for who I am [2x]

The Sands of Time

What do I have to prove?
Is it my life I’m wasting?

The sands of time slip through my hands,
Forever lost, eternally gone.
The Present is the past.
And the past is the future.

Why can’t I stay in one time?
The past haunts me while the future beckons me.
I am the only one who believes that my hourglass has died.
And too much time is going by.

These future images are killing my suspense.
Why must I live like this?

Every waking moment worrying about my present.
From full moon to a crescent.
I always fail because I am waiting for something unknown.

And this is my life.
Who says I have to like it?

My tears moisten the grains of sand.
And my blood brings them to life.

For this once in awhile, I feel as if I am happy,
I feel like this is when I belong.

I wish this time would stay.
But it always seems to go away, so far away…

The Spring's Song

As I walk on this narrow path,
The birds sing,
The flowers blossom.

The trees whisper,
And the creek sings.
My heart yearns for more.

So I keep walking,
Seeing old flowers dying,
And new flowers rising in their place.

From the song of birds…
To the change of color in the trees.
I love the springtime.

They all have their own verse,
To the spring Song,
And it all comes out to be a heavenly sound.

Flowers smell so nice,
They put a wonderful smell into the air.
That makes you relax,
And forget about everything that has happened in your life…

looked at myself at
6:52 PM

Friday, July 15, 2005

Remember all the times we used to play
You were lost and I would save you
I don't think those feelings will ever fade
You were born apart of me
I was never good at hiding anything
My thoughts break me, do you understand what you mean to me?
You are my faith

Won't you cure my tragedy
Won't you cure my tragedy
Don't take her smile away from me
Shes broken and I'm far away
Won't you cure my tragedy
Won't you cure my tragedy
If you make the world a stage for me
Then I hope you can hear me scream
(Won't you cure my tragedy)

When I sit and think of the days we shared
and the nights you covered for me
Every little thing that I ever did
You would stand by me
Every time you would cry it would take my wind
My heart would break
If I could be strong like you were for me
You are my faith

Won't you cure my tragedy
Won't you cure my tragedy
Don't take her smile away from me
She's broken and I'm far away
If you made the world a stage for me
Then i hope that you could hear me scream

Can you hear me scream
Can you hear me scream

Won't you cure my tragedy
Won't you cure my tragedy
Don't take her smile away from me
She's broken and I'm far away
Won't you cure my tragedy
Won't you cure my tragedy
If you made the world a stage for me then i hope that you can hear me scream

I can't take this anymore
I can't feel this anymore
Won't you take and give her pain to me
Cause my whole life I've made mistakes

Can you hear me scream
Can you hear me scream

It's been awhile since I've written...but nothing important has happened since the last time. But I've been pretty depressed and all that happy shit. I am just extremely lonely, and...I have been wanting someone I could never have. One day, I hope...for her. But until that day, I beg that hope will keep be company.

I still hang on every word
in the world of faded memories
where your still in love with me
I can see it in your eyes
you look as if your MAJOR TOM has lost control

I must hold on
This happens all the time
I still find my faith in you
I cant hold on
this happens all the time
I still find my way to you

If a dreams all that ive got
then I wish your in a fairy tale
where your still in love with me
I could see it in your eyes
the look as if your hero fell and lost his soul

I must hold on
This happens all the time
I still find my faith in you
I cant hold on
this happens all the time
I still find my way to you...

To you...
To you...
To you...

I must hold on
This happens all the time
I still find my faith in you
I cant hold on
this happens all the time
I still find my way to you

Listening To: Metallica - Nothing Else Matters

Highlight of the Day: Talking to Lauren and Meghan

Lamia

I am a creation of the night,
This is my one and only conclusion,
Born into servitude of the sun...
Formed by the life of reclusion

Feeding off the fear of mortals,
I live by the light of the moon,
God forsaken and cursed again,
Life depleting, Death...please arive soon.

The reaper won't do any favors,
I want to regress, or start to live,
But when I'm living in the shadows,
That's just being allowed to exist.

Destroy my wings of immortality,
If I must go through this to find happiness,
The let it become who I am,
But only if it leads me through this darkness.

I don't want to 'live' like this,
Do I have to feed off of demonic flesh?
Must this feeling return me to existance?
This is one wish granted I would never wish.

I live in the night's breath,
Although I'm awake, I'm dreaming,
The stars write my destiny's tale,
No matter what happens, my heart keeps beating.

For You...

looked at myself at
7:53 PM